I let my moods dictate my outlook on life way too much. So as life naturally ebbs and flows, I end up swinging back and forth between extremes. Now… I don’t think it’s exactly wrong to be extremely happy at times, but I do see it as very unhealthy that I’ve been so depressed lately when I’ve also been very happy. One day, I’m happy; the next I’m sad. That’s bad, something’s wrong.
My best friend told me today that I’m terrible at hugs. I replied: “I receive it; what can I do better?”.
I’m bad at hugs because I’m not aware enough of the other person involved in the hug. I don’t pay attention to how my hug-partner reacts to my hug-style, from introduction to body to conclusion, and I don’t take the time to appreciate and enjoy their unique and highly-personal huggage either. Hugging was, to me, a simple transaction:
I’m starting to calm down. Might be the meditation that I’m attempting, or the fact that I’ve started reading books again, or how my sleep schedule is a little more normal than it used to be (though I’m messing it up again as I type).
“There are some things in life that are impossible at the moment,” is what I tell myself. “You just have to be patient.”
It might also be because I started playing a game called Skyrim. There are many impossible things in that game. But I assume they won’t be impossible forever. Just like life, in a way.
Seems like the world is made of extremes. I mean, the people of it, I guess. There are people who like to travel and people who like to stay home. There are people who love solitary adventure, and there are people who like being with friends. There are people who want to be out there and people who don’t mind staying here.
There are people on either extreme. Which makes me think, what do I do if I like everything? What if I want to be out *and* in? What if I want to go on adventures but think I’d also be satisfied with a quieter life?