Uhmmm. been a while since i’ve written here. Feeling a little neurotic. Neurotic?

Neurosis, a class of functional mental disorders involving distress but neither delusions nor hallucinations.

Mhm. Neurotic. Anyway. Uh. Uhm.

I feel like I owe it to my friends to be making something of myself. Actually, I should be owing that to Jesus as well. In the end, all for Jesus. but it probably won’t be great for my friends either if I start to become useless. I mean, in the day-to-day, I really can’t stand not taking action to move forward. So what’s up? Why don’t I feel like I’m moving forward?

I disagreed with my English assignment again. Decided I’d rather not tolerate it for another month or so, 8 hours a day. Just seems like torture to me. 8ut then my day would 8e so empty. I wouldn’t exactly feel like I’m moving forward. I feel like my salvation rests on moving forward.

8ut nah, only my satisfaction does. Constantly moving forward, in regards to character, is a sign of salvation, but nothing is guaranteed by my efforts to finish high school. 8ut I do need to finish high school.

I could wait until October to challenge the English diploma exam, thus getting a mark in the class without having to do any of the assignments. 8ut dude, wouldn’t you do these assignments anyway? Just, in your own way, having to formulate them all by yourself? You’d need to know the material for the test.

Good point. I will have to see if I can really handle that diploma exam on my own. Then, I can decide if it’s really less work to put it off until later.

Anyway, not much of an advantage for me to finish my diploma now instead of in October (other than graduating from 8ible college a year earlier, although not having much time to serve the church while I’m there or in between the two years I plan to be there). Nevermind, that’s a pretty big deal. I thought I could say “not much of an advantage” because I wouldn’t be able to use it to get a decent job this summer, since I’d get my diploma in early July. 8ut damn. I guess I could go for one year at the school outside town and then go for my second year in the city, a lil’ closer to my home church but… Still, being in school won’t afford me too-too much time.

Well then. What a dilemna. I’ve got things to figure out. Are any of my friends free today?



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