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[10:20:19 PM] jp: so it’s just a difference in what we think will make us happy, i guess?

[10:20:58 PM] jp: you think that settling down and traveling when you can will make u happy and i think that making it so that people don’t suffer the way i did wil make me happy

[10:21:02 PM] jp: now that i put it that way

[10:21:10 PM] jp: may8e i should[‘nt] center my life on my suffering

what i mean to say is that i want to change the things in the world that i’ve personally suffered through
[10:24:32 PM] jp: things like terri8le, factory-like jo8s that masquerade as something else
[10:24:57 PM] jp: a terri8le, factory-like school system that i fell through, only caught 8y a sewn-on patch
[10:26:18 PM] jp: and a terri8le culture that deprived people of their happiness, promising that they’d just have to wait their turn, their own opportunity to try to take another person’s happiness; all of it only leading to everyone 8eing unhappy
[10:27:03 PM] jp: these are my 3 life purposes and i’m only drawn to change them 8ecause i’ve 8een their victim

why is it that some people
[10:30:03 PM] jp: can think of their own happiness and go for what they’ll enjoy in life
[10:30:28 PM] jp: when i’m stuck thinking that there are people out there that need help
[10:30:36 PM] jp: when i’m concerned for people like me

we pro8a8ly see the future differently, that’s all, lol
[10:36:22 PM] jp: u see
[10:36:39 PM] jp: that your enjoyment won’t weaken
[10:36:55 PM] jp: and u can judge 8est for urself whether that’s true or not

will your 8oat 8reak on those waves if u continue to sail the way you do? you know 8est
[10:37:29 PM] jp: may8e i just have a weaker 8oat, lol

may8e past disappointments have made me 8elieve that nothing lasts
[10:37:59 PM] jp: i see everything as a drug, as an addiction
[10:38:12 PM] jp: the more u have, the more you’ll need to get the same level of high later on
[10:38:47 PM] jp: 8ut if you follow something that changes, like surfing on the waves or admiring the sky,
[10:39:08 PM] jp: you’ll always have something new to experience and the joy of it will never fade
[10:39:37 PM] jp: i guess i just want to live a life that’s constantly changing

[10:40:21 PM] jp: i want to change things so that they’re less sta8le
[10:40:33 PM] jp: not less safe, cuz that’s just dum8
[10:40:49 PM] jp: 8ut change them so that they’re different every day
[10:41:18 PM] jp: and i want that for my recreation too, i guess
[10:41:24 PM] jp: i wanna learn to surf, etc

[10:42:26 PM] jp: it seems less wreckless
[10:42:42 PM] jp: to stay sta8le
[10:43:03 PM] jp: 8ut sta8ility doesn’t always mean never changing
[10:43:24 PM] jp: like tightrope walkers would tell you, 8alance requires constant movement, constant adjustment
[10:43:48 PM] jp: and idno
[10:43:58 PM] jp: i’d rather swing 8ack and forth than stay still

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